Rix Quinn’s Minute Story: December 8, 2018

Rats

I live in a woody area, so I occasionally see some big rats in the neighborhood. One of my friends tells me that long ago, there were actually giant rats.

So I looked it up…and he’s right. Actually, the monster rats measured nine feet long, many times the size of my friend’s gerbil Gerald.

This giant rodent lived nearly eight million years ago. Fortunately for 21^st century people, the animal is now quite sincerely extinct.

Scientists say this beast had huge teeth, a long tail, and weighed as much as a buffalo. This would make him a formidable foe, but a poor dancer.

What did he eat? I’m not sure, but I suspect the answer is “anything he wanted.”

Earlier scientific expeditions to that same region found bones of several huge reptiles, including one eight-foot turtle shell and a bunch of gigantic crocodiles.

Researchers also discovered the teeth of another giant mammal. We’re not sure what it was, but you wouldn’t want it for a house pet.

So, why did those massive rats disappear? No one’s sure, but here’s a guess:

Real, real, real big cats.

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Hair

A  young friend asked my advice the other day. He’s only 27, but he’s losing his hair.

I told him that when mine started falling out, I simply got rid of my mirror.

But seriously, I understand his plight. I also shed mountains of hair daily…much of it from my head.

So I asked him, “Is your hair really receding? Maybe you could comb it differently. Or maybe your forehead just had a growth spurt.”

Here’s a quick test: Get an old high school photo, and compare it with your hairline today. If you notice major mane loss – or if hair falls on the photo while you look at it – you might try remedial action.

I personally favor the “comb-over.” In this evasive maneuver, I simply rearrange hair to cover any bald spots.

Luckily, my eyebrows have grown as scalp hair has flown. I now comb head hair forward and brows backward, and look much like an attractive hedgehog.

Balding remedies have existed for years. Hippocrates developed one made of onions, horseradish, and pigeon droppings. Users named this fowl mixture “Why Is My Girlfriend Vomiting?”

Today, however, we’ve got wonderful options including toupees, chemical remedies, and hair transplants. So don’t despair. There’s repair out there somewhere for missing hair on a scalp that’s bare.

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